Ninh Binh, Vietnam

12th - 15th November 2011 Well, here I am again, trying to work up the desire to write about recent travel trials and traumas by drinking beer. I've only just started my second, and having an enormous burger for lunch is not helping the alcohol absorption process. This is not my usual value for money experience. I'm sitting in a little café/restaurant in Hanoi listening to Katie Melua playing on the restaurant speakers and trying to summon the good feeling that I had in Ninh Binh which was a beautiful place. Having secured ourselves our usual cheap room, we ate, I wrote about the last places we visited and after organising a scooter for the following day, we slept.

From Ninh Binh, Vietnam

Up bright and early, we had omelettes for breakfast and then hit the road planning to take the scenic route to Tam Coc, Djalma wearing some knock-off Ray Bans we found in the fuel compartment under the seat in our little scooter. We ended up being directed by several locals to Highway 1, a busy road linking the North to the South and not the route for a pleasant drive through the countryside. We made it off the road in one piece and fortunately for us, the rest of the way was rather quiet. We followed to the little jetty where set priced row boats were crowded against the concrete shore, bought ourselves a couple of “sightseeing” tickets and a boat ticket, got in with two friendly ladies who took us round the Ngo Dong River.

From Ninh Binh, Vietnam

This part of the world is spectacularly beautiful, limestone karsts punctuate flat fields, which in the rainy season would have been that brilliant green unique to rice paddies, they were more of a green/brown having been recently harvested, but beautiful nonetheless. Of our two lady paddlers, the older one sat at the back of the boat, rowing with her feet and the younger one sat next to Djalma and steered with a small paddle, I, as chief photographer, was in the front of the boat and took pictures of everything we saw.

From Ninh Binh, Vietnam

We didn't arrive as early as we had wanted but this worked in our favour because the sun had had some time to burn off the morning mist shrouding the mini mountains. We followed the small line of boats down the river and passing in-between mountains, by snail fishermen and through caves, it was all idyllic and because all the boats were of the rowing variety, peaceful too.

From Ninh Binh, Vietnam

We reached the end of the line after passing through one last cave, a small army of sellers, hawking cold soft drinks and snacks paddled up and began the hard sell. We'd read about this before hand and had brought plenty of water which we shared with our lady rowers as well as some crackers. We were out of there pretty quickly and returned the same way. After a few minutes the young girl hauled out some embroidered fabric souvenirs (the small village, Van Lan, on the river is famous for its embroidery), just like everyone else was doing on the return trip, but soon put them away again after we explained that we had big backpacks already and couldn't carry any more. She was rather graceful about it considering most of them make the bulk of their income that way and the rest of the trip back was rather peaceful.

From Ninh Binh, Vietnam

Right before the end, Djalma finally got his go at the oars, he certainly looked the part but we didn't manage anythign but circles, the older lady found it hilarious.

From Ninh Binh, Vietnam

We tipped them a dollar each, which doesn't sound much but we don't usually tip unless people are particularly nice and considering most people make that in a day I guess it wasn't too bad. We had an okay meal at a restaurant before getting back on the scooter and taking the scenic route (via small road/paths in-between the paddy fields) to Bich Dong Pagoda.

From Ninh Binh, Vietnam

Parking our scooter we made our way up the steps, Djalma made sure he was properly covered because as a sign advised on entry to the site 'only for respectable guests'. There were about three small buildings on different levels, a large pagoda at the bottom, where people were praying, one in the middle carved into the rock which was really cool and a small building at the top where people left lots of incense sticks.

From Ninh Binh, Vietnam

Behind this last building/temple the limestone meandered further up, Djalma set off to explore and after a little while I followed – it gets rather boring being left behind all the time and plenty of the rocks were shiny from previous adventurers so it wasn't all that dangerous. It didn't take that long, despite being steep in some places and after a little coaxing, Djalma got me to this place.

From Ninh Binh, Vietnam

I wedged my feet into the rocks and enjoyed the spectacular view, however we weren't quite at the top. This time I did stay put while Djalma continued the last few metres, as from his little video, the views were 360° and even more magnificent. After more picture taking and and a little rest we headed back down and got back on the scooter for a little more exploring.

From Ninh Binh, Vietnam

We followed more of the path/roads that run in-between the rice paddies, scaring off ducks and egrets.

From Ninh Binh, Vietnam

It was incredible (and having now been to Halong Bay I think that this place is infinitely more beautiful) everywhere was so quiet and peaceful, I got off the scooter to take some pictures of buffalo which I was about 200x more scared off as soon as I got off our noisy scooter, they're only cool when someone with a stick is a holding a rope attached to their nose, otherwise they're just huge beasts that could flatten you in an instant.

From Ninh Binh, Vietnam

I chased ore ducks into the water and photographed Djalma kissing a cow, it was a very exciting day. We pulled up at another Pagoda and had a wander through the small grounds before having a wee rest.

From Ninh Binh, Vietnam

We drove back to another karst where we parked up and bought a couple of entry tickets before attempting the big steps to the top, I have no idea what the name is – it's not mentioned in the Lonely Planet which I am re-reading as I type – but the dragon or Naga (water dragon thing) is clearly visible running along the top of the mountain from several hundred metres away on the ground.

From Ninh Binh, Vietnam

We made it up the steps, our bums and thighs getting an excellent workout, not to mention our cardiovascular systems, and were rewarded by some more phenomenal views and a couple of teenagers listening to romantic music and snogging. I felt pretty bad about breaking up their little kiss-fest but there were photos to be taken and a little saliva swapping wasn't going to stand between those pictures and myself for very long.

From Ninh Binh, Vietnam

After the young couple had disappeared off to find somewhere a little more private we sat and watched the sun disappear behind a cloud of dust behind the mountains. Before it got too dark we climbed back down and made our way back to town.

From Ninh Binh, Vietnam

That evening, we had dinner at our guest house, fiver beers between us and we spoke to our families at home. The next day we were up nice and early again and after an omelette and a baguette for breakfast we got back on the same scooter and were out on the road just after 7.30. We got lost and were directed to Highway 1 to get to Cuc Phoung National Park. Highway 1, is as important as it sounds, it spans the country from North to South and is full of cars and trucks and well as a gazillion scooters. It's the truckers that gave us a fright though, one coming our way on the opposite lane, overtook someone who wasn't driving 200kmp/h and left us about 6 inches on our side of the road. Yes it's an important road but in lots of places it isn't that big and with no proper road markings either (not that they would be used for anything other than decoration) we were off it as soon as we were able and fortunately for us the rest of the way was through some peaceful and beautiful Viet countryside. We stopped to take some photos of ladies weeding enormous gardens and taking buffalo for walks, we even saw an enormous pig in a box strapped to the back of a scooter but I was too slow to get a photo.

From Cuc Phuong National Park, Vietnam

We pulled up at the entrance of the National Park and got our entry tickets, we only wanted to have wander round and see a 1000 year old tree and maybe if time have a look at the monkey sanctuary. Cuc Phoung National Park is significant because it was Vietnam's first National Park, established in 1962 by Uncle Ho Chi Minh himself, its about 25km and 11km wide and is 100% wonderful. From the ticket hut it's a 20km drive along a small road amid a sea of green trees, to get to the beginning of most trails. At the end is an open building where people can rest and have a drink, we met a Czech couple who gave us some tips about getting home a much nicer way. After a quick toilet stop we set off to see the 1000 year old tree.

From Cuc Phuong National Park, Vietnam

The park was quiet and the route fairly well paved in most places, it was all up and down though – some more excellent exercise for the buns. It was just beautiful although there were these large spiders all over the ground, they weren't frightening just creepy, the kind that might appear in a Harry Potter film, a big fat purple body with ridiculously long spindly legs (I didn't look close enough to see if there were any fangs but I was happy that I'd worn trainers and not flip flops). We bounded up steps and we bounded down steps and after an hour or so we reached the ancient tree. Honestly, I was expecting it to be bigger and perhaps, a little more impressive? It looked like a zillion other trees we'd seen elsewhere.

From Cuc Phuong National Park, Vietnam

Oh I almost forgot, the grasshoppers, there were lots of little green grasshoppers everywhere, we started following a trail to another ancient tree but we didn't find anything except lots of bamboo, banana tree and grasshoppers – not bad runners up really.

From Cuc Phuong National Park, Vietnam

We finished the loop and then, possibly the most exciting part of the day, I drove us back to the Primate Rescue Centre. I made it to third gear and only stalled about 17 times, it was brilliant. We didn't fall off, get run off the road by oncoming or overtaking minivans and I even managed a few hill starts – the times when I stalled. I even got fairly good at gear changing, only up though - I couldn't change down through the gears. I also shouted a lot, beeped my horn even when there weren't any corners (sorry timid wildlife!) and used my eyes as insect catchers.

From Cuc Phuong National Park, Vietnam

We managed to join a little tour that was just starting around the centre and followed the little group around all the different cages, trying to get photos of all the different monkeys – I was too preoccupied with getting decent shots that I missed much of what the guide said, I can only tell you that gibbons have very long arms and no tails.

From Cuc Phuong National Park, Vietnam

After the primates we were escorted round a turtle sanctuary which was pretty cool although a turtle pulling its head back into its shell looks a lot like a certain part of a gentleman's region, take a look and see for yourself.

From Cuc Phuong National Park, Vietnam

Primates and turtles viewed we got back on our scooter and following the Czech couples advice took a truly beautiful route home, had it not been so late in the day we would have stopped more often to take photos, but it was getting dark so we settled for some sunset photos and pictures of a group of curious but insanely shy children who ran away when we took a photo of them.

From Cuc Phuong National Park, Vietnam

I took over the camera and showed them the pictures and they all screamed and fell about when they saw them. When we were putting out helmets back on they had worked up enough courage to shout the things that they knew in English, 1, 2, 3, 4... (that was it) and hello! It was utterly charming, we waved goodbye and arrived home cloaked in dust but in one piece and happy to have avoided Highway 1.

From Cuc Phuong National Park, Vietnam

We met the Czech couple for dinner that evening and went to a local restaurant to try the local speciality – goat. It was particularly well butchered – everything was cut up and thrown in the pan, a lot of it gristle. Fried sweetcorn was a bit hit though and I filled up on that with pan fried greens and garlic. We had a lie in until 7.30, it was heaven I tell you! I spent an hour just deleting photos – more than 500 from the previous two days. We used the internet, packed and left getting a soft seat train to Hanoi. I'm writing this almost two weeks after it happened and I honestly cannot remember what the train was like – it can't have been that comfortable. We arrived in Hanoi after a few hours and got a bus to a smaller station with only one track to wait for the next train to Haiphong. While waiting at the station I tried to go to the loo but apparently a western wee is twice as much as a Viet wee, I got in such a strop that I snatched my money from the thieving hag who was trying to overcharge me and my wee and then sat and waited for two hours until the train came (once then train arrived I had to wait a further half an hour because you can't wee while the train is in the city). Really rather hating Vietnam by this point and sniffling a bit, Djalma took pity on me and went out twice to find some chocolate, the stuff he brought back was brown, but I'm not sure it had any cocoa in it. He did point out that it said 50% but it didn't say what was 50%... who knows? Another 4-5 hour train ride, through some stunning fields and mountains and we arrived in Haiphong after 9pm. I was miserable and tired and the cheap hotel recommended in the guide had been turned into a car park. Bloody marvellous. We ended up in a nice hotel in a nice room which we got at a rather good price mainly by begging and not going anywhere else. After dumping our bags we went straight out to a swanky Thai restaurant and had a prawn red curry with rice and some sautéed vegetables. Expensive but beautiful. The next morning we walked through town to get to the fast ferry, we stopped off at a small place for breakfast and then got out tickets. We sat down to wait and met Claude from Luxembourg (does anyone know what you call someone from Luxembourg? Luxembourgian??) We got the boat together, he and Djalma were at the front chatting while I sat on a small plastic chair and read, the wind knocking the empty chairs next to me on the floor.

From Cat Ba Island, Halong Bay, Vietnam

After an hour we arrived at Cat Ba Island the largest island in Halong Bay and took a room on the 6th floor looking out over the bay.

Dong Hoi, Vietnam

10th - 11th November 2011 Upstairs in our little hotel room we sat and watched Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun Li, I did my best to concentrate on editing the rest of the photos from Hue but I got caught up in it too. Embarrassing but true. Djalma kept on interrupting to fill me in on the background of the game that he had played growing up. Our stomachs were empty but we waited until the end of the film before heading to a nearby restaurant to fill up on rice, pork, morning glory and fried egg. I headed back and wrote for a couple of hours while Djalma introduced himself to the group of guys who were playing football outside the restaurant. We watched another film, Firestarter, adapted from the Stephen King novel, and ended up going to bed just after midnight (very late for us old farts).

From Dong Hoi, Vietnam

Dong Hoi is a largish town, twinned with smaller Dong Ha across the river. They were both hit very hard with lots of bombing during the American War (that's 'Nam to everyone else) but Dong Hoi regenerated much more quickly after the war finished. Most people who come to this town take a taxi or a scooter out to caves a few kilometres outside of town. Along the way to the caves you can see the bomb craters which have now been utilised as fish farms, we decided to explore the town and the beach because we were leaving in the afternoon and didn't have enough time.

From Dong Hoi, Vietnam

The next morning Djalma had to drag me out of bed but I was glad he did. We were out by 8.30am and after an egg baguette we strolled to the river front and headed into the morning market. We walked past ladies squatting over basket selling vegetables, women haggling over said greens, people waving us over to buy things, with the hand motion peculiar to certain countries – they hold an arm out to you, the hand facing down and they bring the fingers down repeatedly. We walked past cages of chickens, waiting to be sold , strangled and cooked – live animals definitely solves the problems regarding lack of refrigeration, but it's not that nice passing by a chicken having its neck snapped.

From Dong Hoi, Vietnam

The market faced out onto the river and blue and red boats were lined up with smaller boats punting in-between them selling stuff to the guys that couldn't be bothered to go ashore. We followed the river and saw lots of little wooden shacks on stilts, the reason for their being became apparent when they raised huge nets and then paddled out in the little round tub boats to check for fish.

From Dong Hoi, Vietnam

A small group of school children saw us coming and started screeching their hellos, it was too painful to be cute but they were very sweet, demanding to have their photos taken and then more shouting and laughing when I showed them the pictures. I waved goodbye and then they grouped round Djalma who was a little further behind.

From Dong Hoi, Vietnam

Crossing a bridge we saw even more boats in the water just before the river joined the sea. They were beautiful, bright blue, red and white and sitting quietly on the water. A few minutes later we reached the final stop on our morning stroll, the beach.

From Dong Hoi, Vietnam

It was deserted save for a few men with their fishing rods wedged into the sand. We sat and listened to the surf, the sun came out from behind the clouds and made the water even more beautiful. It was just as a beach should be, no shops, no hawkers, no rubbish (well not much), lots of sand and plenty of peace and quiet. Djalma filmed the surf crashing in on the shore and before we left I decided to have a little paddle, Djalma got all Russian on me and took a bucket load of photos. We walked back quickly to get back in time to check out, not stopping except to get some more water.

From Dong Hoi, Vietnam

We checked out, returned to the same restaurant and had the same food, this time with the welcome addition of bamboo. We decided to walk the 3km to the train station, having booked our ticket when we arrived the previous day. About two hundred metres away nature started calling urgently and after handing Djalma my bag I hurried off to find a toilet. Now here's a funny poo story I'd like to share with the world (it's actually a little too soon for me to find this funny but I'm sure I will given a little more time); after asking for a toilet at a hotel near the station they waved me on to the public toilets, I had no idea where they were pointing, so a girl showed me the sign. I hurried on and thankfully there were pictures for men and women because I'm still not sure what 'women' is in Vietnamese. I hurried into a stall, that didn't lock, ripped my trousers a little in the hurry to get them down, and just in time – my body let rip in the toilet and not inside my pants. Now I was in a quandary, in my haste to actually have a shit – number one priority – I hadn't considered, as I usually do, the consequences of having that shit. There was no bucket, no tap and certainly no toilet roll, the toilet flushed but it emptied directly into the bowl. In my rush to find a loo I had left the emergency stash of toilet roll with Djalma, who I now tried calling for, squatting in my little stall with my pants round my ankles. Obviously, he couldn't hear me, I was well tucked away in the toilets which were tucked away behind the station, no chance, but wait... a little old lady heard my shouts saw my face peering out from behind the door and, lets face it, it wasn't rocket science to figure out what I needed. Something to clean my ass with. Seeing me she waved me back into my stall and looked like she was going to do something. She did nothing. I waited and then started shouting for Djalma again, I started to panic (without going into details mine was not a self cleaning shit, it was more of a mudslide) as my legs started to go numb and our train time drew nearer I knew that I had to go, clean ass or not. I pulled up my pants very gingerly and tried to walk as naturally as possible, I passed the little old lady who had not helped me (what a witch) and as I did she held out her hand for money. I tried to stay calm, I said 'no, sorry', she predictably got pissed off and rattled her bag at me showing me a 5000 dong note (about 25¢). I didn't have any money on me, I had nothing, if I'd had a 5000 dong note I probably would have used it in lieu of the toilet roll. After lots of shouting at me and waving the money, I did it again. I lost my cool and shouted back at her. I let loose at this little old lady, I shouted that it was shameful that she was trying to collect money when there was no way to wash your hands let alone your arse. That didn't work, so I shouted that I had poo all over my bum, she didn't understand that either and then I started crying. I had a poo-ey bum bum and I was shouting at a little old lady because I had neglected to take loo roll and she hadn't helped me. This was not what travelling was supposed to be about. After the shouting and the crying I waved her off and went to find my husband and the bog roll. I couldn't stop the tears, it was humiliating, it was like everyone waiting at the platform knew my bottom hadn't been cleaned post poo. I cried at Djalma and then had to wait for the train to arrive, fill up and then leave the station. This was a LONG TIME, I stood while I waited and as soon as the train pulled away the guy unlocked the bog and I was in, finishing the job I had started twenty minutes earlier. Feeling much more human but still utterly let down and shat on by the universe, I returned to my seat able to sit down and enjoy the view.

From Dong Hoi, Vietnam

The ride took about five hours and passed through some truly beautiful terrain, mountains in the back ground, rice paddies in the fore and the occasional graveyard with ornate colourful graves dotted about somewhere in between. The journey was only marred by the few smokers in our carriage who smoked despite the no smoking signs and my poor mood.

From Dong Hoi, Vietnam

We arrived in Vinh after the sun had gone to bed and got a taxi to the state run hotel near a large amusement park. Passing through the nice lobby we walked out of the nice new hotel and into the old soviet style crumbling block where our cheapo room was. We took the room, not wanting to trawl the town for another hotel. After a warmish shower we headed out to take a look at the Amusement Park and to get some dinner. I was feeling pretty glum, what started out as a lovely day had degenerated into a shit one, my mood brought Djalma's down and we walked in silence. There wasn't much in town, Vinh is quite big but we weren't near the centre and so we weren't exactly spoiled for choice in the restaurant department. We eventually found a place and after much faffing about, pointed to what a girl was eating and ordered two of 'that please' it was greasy but it was food. The tables around us were full of drunk cheerful guys who tried to help with our food ordering but couldn't despite increased fluency due to alcohol. We walked round the Amusement Park which was dead, not surprising when it was open every night – it's hardly going to be a rocking place every night of the week – and then back to our hotel, putting our bloated bodies to bed, having decided to leave the next morning. Vinh is a large concrete town hurriedly rebuilt after the war, with new façades to pretty it up and new green spaces, it's just 14km SE from Kim Lien, Ho Chi Minh's birthplace, which had we stayed a little longer we may have gone to see. It's just a concrete 1959 reconstruction of his family home, but it would have been quite cool to see it. The next day I discovered a HUGE spider in the bathroom, it was the size of my palm, even Djalma agrees so you know I'm not exaggerating (I clarified the size with him before writing it here) he came in and hit it with his flip flop a few times, jumping when the not-quite-dead spider touched his foot (that made me feel much better!). We walked to the bus station, got a mystery meat sandwich and then tried to get a ticket. Guys, if you want adventure, beautiful scenery, great food, interesting history and all that jazz, you can find it in a place other than Vietnam. The place is gorgeous, it is beautiful, there is good food and most of you know at least a little of the place's history, but the people are so aggressive. I think I've got it figured out now, people shout but that's normal, people shove and push, that's normal too, people act very aggressively as soon as you say no, I'm not sure whether this is normal or behaviour saved for troublesome/annoying tourists. Whatever, it really doesn't matter what's cultural and what's rude, what I do know is that it makes travelling here occasionally unpleasant. Of course there are lovely people too, people who are sweet and helpful and charming, people who return your smile, who don't wave you away like a pesky mosquito when they can't be arsed to help, but there are the flip-side of these wonderful people. The touts for the bus to Ninh Binh (and then Hanoi) were flip-side people and utterly infuriating. We checked the times and prices in the ticket office, we were told 10am and 150,000 dong to Hanoi (about 7.50USD), we sorted ourselves out and then were led to the 10am sleeper bus by one of the touts with bad skin and an attitude to match. We stowed our bags away and then tried to buy our tickets to Ninh Binh (which is about two thirds of the way between Vinh and Hanoi). The greedy guts tried to sell us tickets for 200,000 dong and then the farce commenced. I smiled and told him that the price was 150,000 to Hanoi, so he matched that price for Ninh Binh which wasn't quite good enough really, he dropped it to 130,000 and after we said no, he waved us away and couldn't be bothered to talk to us any more. We took our bags out and tried to sort something out at the ticket office, no joy, a nice guy tried to help and even his eyes nearly fell out at the original asking price, he explained to yet another tout who was loudly talking at us in Vietnamese with a high pitched nasal whine (even more irritating). As 10am came and went, we settled on the last offered price of 120,000 and got back on the bus which was still there. Not the nicest start to the day. Six hours and more stunning scenery later we pulled up at an indeterminate point in Ninh Binh. We back tracked to the centre and got the cheapest room in the first hotel we stopped at.

Hue, Vietnam

7th - 10th November 2011 Rain, rain, rain. As soon as we had sorted out our room with a view we headed out for noodles. We stopped at what turned out to our favourite restaurant for a long time, I think it's fair to say that because of this place, I now think that Vietnamese cuisine has a bit more going for it than flavourless noodle soup (al-right, sometimes you do get a decent broth but it's hit and miss), fried egg baguettes (I think these are the business, delicious) and dog. We had some Hue noodles, which was basically noodle soup with perfect pieces of beef and on the side; bean sprouts and salad leaves to add as you desire. It was delicious, there is something indescribably heartening and warming about soup on a cold wet miserable day. After the lovely old lady at our hotel, the friendly guy at the restaurant who was serving us and the warming effect of the soup, I decided that Hue was definitely one of the nicer places in Vietnam. To round of the feeling of warm deliciousness we also had pudding. We had not had pudding for ages, I can't even remember the last time we ordered dessert. Our friendly waiter suggested the banana pancake with chocolate sauce and Djalma opted for proper crepes, sprinkled with plenty of sugar and lemon juice, they were delicious but they couldn't compare to the wonderful light, fluffy, crispy, banana filled, chocolate covered vision and taste of heaven that sat in front of me (and not for very long). Feeling sated and warm and happy we left the weather to itself, waded back to our little room, had hot showers and watched Mosquito Island.

From Hue, Vietnam

The next day came round and we were up bright and early, we decided to get breakfast on the way to the market. We strolled along the road by the Perfume river and reached the market – fresh produce being sold on the street, the undesirable outer leaves of cabbages and various other vegetables strewn across the ground making it squelchy to walk through. We wandered down a street looking for food – I was fussy, I wanted something other than noodle soup for breakfast. I wanted a fried egg baguette! We ended up eating at a fast food baguette place, a small army of teenage girls worked in a tiny area, cutting baguettes and slathering on Mayo or butter on one side, pate on the other, another girl putting in slices of cured and processed meats, someone else inserting the odd green leave and a spring onion, another bagging them and a couple of girls taking orders and money. We had to push in to get served and after a guy tried to get n front of me – I saw that he wasn't next in line cheeky bastard, I, hungry and grumpy from lack of food and with very UN-English aggression, deliberate stood right in front of him and put my order first. We ate our warm meaty baguettes and wandered in the direction of the citadel.

From Hue, Vietnam

Hue is the cultural capital of Vietnam, well it's packed with temples, tombs, palaces and pagodas, most of which are fairly well preserved despite heavy battering from artillery and hand to hand combat in 1968 during the Tet Offensive (when the commies took control of the city for about three weeks before the South Vietnamese Army took it back with help from the Americans). The other reason there is so much here is because of the Nguyen Royalty who controlled the country (from the 18th century to 1945) from the citadel city, Phu Xuan. This is the place that we were on our way to see, unfortunately in my rush to leave the hotel and get on our way we left the map in our room, so we wandered about within the walls of the citadel, dodging out of the way of scooters driving too fast and kicking up water and cars doing the same thing. The whole place was flooded, about knee deep in some places, the sky was grey, it drizzled almost constantly, it let up occasionally and occasionally the heavens opened. We stopped for a typical Vietnamese coffee – a pre-mixed coffee concoction with zero caffeine content, sweetened with an equal amount of condensed milk and then topped up with massive chunks of bashed ice. We sat underneath a large canopy perched atop a small tower of child-sized chairs our legs in water that reached half way up pour calves, our drinks balanced on little tables. We watched as a couple of boys tried to paddle in a little canoe, falling in so often that it became less of a competition as to who could stay in the longest and more of who could do it the most spectacularly.

From Hue, Vietnam

Moving on we came to on of he walls of the inner citadel which was reserved for Royalty and guests only, we walked through the doors and were greeted by a man sweeping the water and leaves to one side 'NO!' He mimed water up to the knee, we said no problem and moved further in, the guy totally lost it, shouting NO NO NO! Waving his arms around and pulling horrible faces (I think this is something that everyone's face does when they're angry), Djalma shouted back and then the horrid little man ran, ran to his little office (Djalma later confessed that he thought the guy was running to get a gun, he was that angry) and came out waving a walkie talkie. We left after that, feeling rather hateful to be honest, he could have easily got a job as a 'tourist bus' driver.

From Hue, Vietnam

We followed the outside of the wall, taking care to avoid the moat surrounding the citadel in the citadel and eventually reached the ticket office. Well the man could have mimed getting a ticket or shown us where to go, but instead when we tried to talk to him he got al aggressive. This is easily my biggest problem with Vietnam, people jump to shouting, shoving and aggressive behaviour way to quickly for my liking. We paid our money to the lady sitting on her chair with her feet in the water and continued through to explore our way round the rather larger small inner city.

From Hue, Vietnam

We walked into a large square, the drizzle picked up some weight and we walked round the covered sides to a large green area flanked by two identical red pavilion type things (I really should have read the labels) opening out into a raised garden area looking out to the moat in front of the enclosing wall.

From Hue, Vietnam

Still without a map we splashed through flooded tree lined street after flooded tree lined street peering over walls and through gaps in the brickwork to see things that were closed. We came across a beautiful building, painted yellow and set in some beautifully manicured gardens.

From Hue, Vietnam

There was the best guttering system I have even seen, on the roof a huge fish face with an open mouth spurted rain water down a central gap on the roof down to the gutter and then onto the pavement. The roof tiles them selves were glazed different shades of burnt orange and the rows ended in round tiles decorated with motifs. Through the wet garden and out the garden we walked into a flooded garden that we'd seen over a wall but couldn't get into because the doors were locked. After I slipped on a muddy tile I stayed glued to Djalma's side, we waded along a path that followed a small river, a bit of a joke really, and over a bridge. The place was beautiful and deserted, there were large rock formations planted with orchids and ferns as a kind of garden ornament I guess. There were also lots of outdoor murals, painted in bright colours and adorned with pieces of china and shells, some of the detail was 3D and little birds looked at each other in a rather charming way. It all felt very Chinese, not having been to China (yet) I can't pick out what is Chinese and therefore what might be Vietnamese.

From Hue, Vietnam

Having spent several hours wandering around the citadel without any water or food, I decided that we should head back, fortunately despite being very lost in the beginning, the way out was easy and we passed several flooded fields before ending up back at the beginning. We climbed to the top of the building where the ticket office was and looked out at the semi panoramic views before climbing down the steps to find that the water level had, despite the rain, receded rather a lot. Crossing over a bridge to our side of the river we came upon a vegetarian restaurant and shared a set menu, with several different dishes; fried aubergine, tofu, make believe chicken, sour soup (with pineapple), rice and spring rolls with a thick peanut sauce. It was gorgeous but rich and we walked very slowly back to our hotel. Djalma feel asleep and while he lay dreaming (at 5pm) I worked on the pictures and the blog entry for Hoi An (much more productive!). We returned to the nice restaurant where we had the Hue Noodle soup and tucked into the most delicious beef pan fried with lemongrass, chilli and garlic, a salad and a seafood noodle soup.

From Hue, Vietnam

After a good nights sleep and a lazy morning we got a couple of bikes from our hotel and then went for breakfast at the same restaurant. Hello Banana Pancakes! Djalma got some seafood with rice but I definitely got the best dish, it was heavy but heavenly. After playing with the ridiculously cute fluffy puppy we set off crossing over the Perfume River that looked more like eau d'Toilette in the literal sense rather than anything beautiful and purple hued that I'd seen in some pictures. We stopped at a mosquito feeding station just because there were lots of people outside, inside a grumpy middle aged woman told us that it was flower garden, sounding much like the “bonsai” garden we visited to fill out our tour in Vinh Long, we decided to give it a miss.

From Hue, Vietnam

Jumping back on our bikes and getting away as quickly as possible from the clouds of HUGE hungry mozzies we followed the road and the river to the very popular Thien Mu Pagoda. Since it was first built in the 17th century it has been destroyed and rebuilt several times, it does have a nice story though... A direct quote from LP 'According to legend, a Fairy Woman (Thien Mu) appeared and the people that a lord would come and build a pagoda for the country's prosperity. On hearing this Nguyen Hoang ordered a pagoda to be constructed here.' Isn't that nice. The seven stories of the tower are dedicated to a different manushi-buddha – buddhas that appeared in human form. It was surrounded by a couple of small buildings and behind a building housed a laughing Buddha. Out the back, gardens stretched out, the beautiful orange tiles ready to give a careless the slip.

From Hue, Vietnam

We got on our bikes, leaving the pagoda and another angry man behind – when we pulled up and parked our bikes and he appeared and shouted NO! and started doing the same thing as the man the previous day – jumping about, looking mean, waving his hands around and generally behaving like he was a stroppy six year old.

From Hue, Vietnam

We cycled a few kilometres away from the Eau d'Toilette River and to the beginning of the Royal Tombs. We cycled up and down hills, dodging the odd scooter and stopping for more of the half coffee half condensed milk stuff that I don't really like but can't seem to stop drinking and these really odd sausages that had bits of gristle with tubes attached, needless to say this sustained Djalma over the next few hours and not my fussy self.

From Hue, Vietnam

We passed by large burial grounds on the sides of hills, the tombs facing out over a sea of green, the only picture I took didn't do it justice, these were the most beautiful graveyards I've ever seen. We eventually came to the would be final resting place of the wealthiest and longest reigning of the Nguyen Emperors. This guy lived in the grounds that he planned to be buried in but he was so rich and had so much loot that when it finally came to putting him in the ground he was buried in a secret place and the 200 servants who buried him were all beheaded so no-one could loot the loot. Stingy in death but not when it came to furnishing his pad and living life.

From Hue, Vietnam

He larged it up writing poetry and shagging his 104 wives, not to mention all the lusty concubines he kept on standby. He didn't have any children, not because his willy fell off from so much action but rather a bout of smallpox that resulted in sterility. The grounds were covered with pine trees and bare frangipani trees. We had to pay to get in so we took our time exploring the grounds. They were enclosed by a wall, he had a pond with an island in the middle, three mausoleums (that we found) and a really cool pagoda type things in front of his tomb which of course was the most elaborately decorated. The whole place was beautiful and because of the rain, peaceful. We left around 4ish in a hurry to get to get back before dark.

From Hue, Vietnam

We cycled like we were being chased by all the angry men we'd met in Vietnam and made it back in really good time. Worried about being cut up in the evening traffic I whistled as I overtook scooters and other cyclists, changing to bellowing out the few lines I know of Queen's hits when the traffic got heavier. I may sound silly but I'm not dead and no-one pulled out in front of me. We arrived back well before dark, completely wet but cheerful. We quickly planned the next stop and wanting avoid buses for the time being we booked train tickets to the next town. I say we, it took Djalma more than an hour to get there and back – it was a twenty minute round trip at most. Just as I was starting to get worried he strolled through the door and told me that he was looking at which train and ticket to get (it's fairly complicated here, I'll explain later) he turned to the lady at the counter who promptly put her sign up and told him that it was closed for dinner and he'd have to wait for an hour. Charming, so he went and got a beer and the wait wasn't all that bad. We went back to our favourite restaurant for dinner, feeling adventurous we ordered squid stuffed with pork, shrimp, noodles and mushrooms, some sautéed vegetables and a mix soup, we splashed out and got a couple of Hue beers, surprisingly good actually. Feeling merry on our beer we decided to head down to Brown Eyes, a bar we'd been given Buy One Get One Free flyers for. We had some welcome shots, free snacks and over sweet Singapore slings. When I say over sweet, I mean sickly, teeth achingly sweet, I'm surprised I have any pegs left. We played Jenga and watched Vietnam kick Est Timors ass in the SEA Games (South East Asia football league). Rolling home to relax, I started working on photos and ended up talking to my wife for over an hour for the first time in weeks if not months. Heaven, it put such a big smile on my face (thanks Gabs!). After ringing off I washed off the smoke from my body and then go into bed and slept like a baby next to my already snoring husband. I did yoga the next morning, I waited until 9am when I wasn't feeling quite so rough and wobbled my way through my usual routine. We packed, checked out and then walked to the vegetarian restaurant for another set menu before making our way to the train station for our first train. Exciting!

From Hue, Vietnam

It was a little late and we left just after 1.30pm, we passed through some beautiful countryside, plenty of flooded fields, herds of water buffalo, people in coolie hats, loads of trees and mountains misting up in the background. Four and a half hours later we pulled into Dong Hoi, which is about half way between the North and South, after a circus with the taxi guys who were all very friendly and spoke their English phonetically (just making the sounds without much understanding) we got into one taxi with our laughing lovely driver who then dropped us in the right part of town (it was touch and go for a while) and we made our way to a cheap guest house bypassing the more expensive hotels.